Deliderata's Journals

question............

ever felt lost in something that is so spontaneos and beautiful?

that kind of scary falling..becoming somebody you hate, of losing the comfortable values in the process?

As the sun sets today

As the sun sets today, i also say goodbye to a former student. A year ago, i met him, an eager applicant in a program i am involved with. Barely 17, he painted his dreams of a better life for his family, of helping a single mother who has been working as a maid to support his two younger siblings schooling. I was caught.

I saw his progress from school to his apprenticeship. Outstanding. He graduated with merit awards and gave the graduation speech representing his classmates. He enthusiastically joined almost 50 classmates singing this batch song they personally chose :

What has life to offer me when I grow old

What is there to look forward to, beyond the biting cold

They say its typical, stereotypical,

You gotta be conventional, You cant be so radical

I sing this song for all of my age for these are the questions we got to face.

In this cycle that we called life

We are the one who are next in line

We got to work, we got to feel

We got to work and do whatever it takes....

There was no wasted time after graduation. He wanted to find work and contribute to the family financially.With good academis standing and recommendations, he passed interviews, but he was just 17, not yet of legal age. He was so happy to be a part of fieldwork research of national census. Last week, he finished it and is looking forward to September 21, as he turns 18 and be of legal age to work.

But yesterday, September 11 was his last sunset due to fever. That is not sure because it was DOA case when he arrived in the hospital.There was no resources for autopsy, the family members who were around him didnt have the clarity of mind and financial resources for such option. His case was registered as 'heart attack.

At 17!

This 17 year-old taught me as much as i was his teacher.His jovial disposition, his ismple joys and easy smiles, his humility, his love for the family, and his big, big hope.........he is one of my many,many inspirations.........

Another sunset........ taking away a beautiful person i am priveleged to meet.

Ive been Tagged to share - People I like and admired :)

Desertlily tagged me to share 10 people whom i like and had crush and like.

rules of the tag..
1. You post your top 10 fantasy guys/girls
2. You tag 10 people.
3. You CANNOT tag someone who has already been tagged.
4. You have to let the people you tagged know that they've been tagged.
5. These are the rules they must be repeated every time.
6. THERE MUST BE PHOTOS! AT ALL TIMES!

There are just so many! I have been a creature of influence of so many people . My weakness are words - lyrics and the medium of expression. Here, in no particular order are first 10 that i could think of...

1.ANGGUN. Soulful and passionate singer.
Favorite Quote:

If your hopes scatter like the dust across your track
Iâ�™ll be the moon that shines on your path
The sun may blind our eyes, Iâ�™ll pray the skies above
For snow to fall on the sahara

2. Leonard COHEN

His poems are just so INCREDIBLE! I wish i could just be as eloquent and articulate as he is.

3. The Kula Shaker Band...i have no news of them now but they're part of my college life crushes....

Favorite quote:

It takes time to find the place you love
Well if youâ�™ve got to be sure in that feeling youâ�™ve got to take time
It takes time to find the place you love,
Itâ�™s a long road... long journey home. - Hollow Man

4 & 5 - Ethan HAWKE & Julia DELPY. Before Sunrise and Before Sunset, are two of my favorite movies. I like Ethan and Julia's tandem! One of my favorite quote from here is when Ethan Hawke said "Life's hard, it is supposed to be. If we didnt suffer, we'd never learn anything"

6. Johnny DEPPP. He just is one of the best.He just is!

7. JOHN MAYER. Im just another teener fan watching him and his crying guitar :).

Favorite quote:

So go on baby, Make your little get away
My pride will keep me company, And you just gave yours all away
Now I'm gonna dress myself for two, Once for me and once for someone new
I'm gonna do somethings you wouldn't let me do
Oh I'm gonna find another you

8. SALMA HAYEK.

one of the most natural and profound actress for me. so art personified, and has always stood ground for what she believes in.My favorite of hers are Frida and In times of the Buterflies.

9. Frida Kahlo. The picture below was my first recognition of her when my friend gave me that postcard. I admire her strenght and art (a painter-wannabe that I am) and i really like the ingenuity she puts her favorite subject. Everytime I look at her paintings, i cant help thinking of the question: Why am I so profound? :)

My favorite quote of her: I paint self portraits because I am so often alone.
Because I am the subject I know best."

10. And now of HIM who shares my passion for wandering and discovering life and love.

Well, I dont know whom to tagged anymore, so just i'll say whoever reading and havent done this yet, do try...it is fun :)

Thanks D.Lily

8 Random Facts About Deliderata

Well, Lexidiem (John) tagged me, and even sent me an easy-to way of joining the crowd. Whoaa, 8 facts about me which is kind of a challenge because i am a bits of many things. Buts heres the first 8 i can think of.

1. I am usually happy and talkative and well, always moving. I cant stay sad long but i do get moments of reflection too, especially lately. But im blessed with may lovely people -friends and family who are always a call and touch away when my colorful world becomes too dim. I am ashamed to say it but my family, while i love them much, i sometimes think their love is greater for me, they always are around to catch and help and let me be.

2. Children...i love children!!!! i hope to have 3 or 4. I wanted a big family.:)

3. The sea, the ocean for me, are the best way to relax and dream. Perhaps because this is my remembrance of pure life, childhood, playing. mother and 2 siblings. There is something about the sea breeze that calms and lulls me. But also, while I profess my great love for swimming, i still am not confident doing it in the sea. It has always been a place to sit down and frolick with the waves. Swimming for me is most often done in the pool :)

4.Curently working on a reasearch about effects of water privatization in a slum areas of Manila. Being in this kind of work humbles me. I never cease to feel amaze as to how hope floats amidst the need and extreme poverty around the place, and how they keep their faith in life and love. Im also a part-time student and a part-time teacher. and I love being both.

5. I love visiting galleries and art corners. It frustrates me to a point and envy the talent of these wonderful and gifted people. At the same time, looking at their creations has a way of mellowing me.

6. I write better with pictures, be it poem or story or report. I guess thats not much strange.Taking picture is a hobby i cannot live without.

7. Yellow and Black and Purple are my most favorite colors. And im a coffee person.

8. No, im never good in following the how-tos instructions. Im not patient in reading it, the how-to assembly, even reading map, and well,one reason why i didnt pursue photography are having too many instructions on lights and other style. Im not proud of it, but i guess im just kind of lazy and impatient on that. I dwell much on intution.

So, thats the most random thoughts that went to me. I enjoyed it in a way John..hahahaha...

So im not sure if they'll kill me and am not even sure if somebody has tagged them already but 8 friends - here i am tagging you in this :)

ipsisimus, theshadowboxer,charlymaravilla, angrylambie, denica, aya110, bobby, pixeltopia

.........

Di ko na alam ang gagawin ko sa iyo
Paikot-ikot lang, nalilito, oh baâ�™t ganito
Paggising sa umaga, ikaw ang nasa isip
Tulog sa gabi, laman ng panaginip
Mahal ba kita, o ano, ewan ko

Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko sa iyo
Simula nang makilala di maipinta ngiti sa mata
Magdamag ang kwentuhan, kulitan, tawanan
Di ko maintindihan, bakit ngayon lang
Kung kelan ang puso ko ay maselan

Di ko na alam ang gagawin ko sa iyo
Paikot-ikot lang, nalilito, oh baâ�™t ganito
Hindi mo lang alam, takot lang akong masaktan
Iniingatan lang aking puso
Kung maiibibigay ko lang ang sinasabi mo
Di na sana tayo nagkakaganito
Pasensya ka na kung hanggang dito muna tayo

Hanggang dito na lang, hanggang dito na lang....

-julianne, tulak ng bibig, kabig ng dibdib...

i think that someone has access to my buzznet account

..found some changes that i didnt do...

Arrghhh

Had a blister from motorcycle last Sunday. My friend avoided some strange toys rolling from the road in a village. So we kind of swerve. Strange becaue the past three days it seemed okay. Now its bothering me a bit. I dont want to put bandage coz it looks theatric. besides i have occasional bouts of cramps. My mom told me to use aloe vera plant that I fortunately have in my little veranda. Its like a miracle plant. Helps a lot. Better than the balm or whatever ointment that i was advised to use. And cheaper!!!

But damn, i gotta to stick to wearing skirts this week and some time so. And break from swimming.... :)

zzzzzz

this pretty much describes my summer in between bouts of migraine from the rising humidity, unfinished (and unstarted) papers, messy apartment and over-the-cup of coffee...were my taking-oh-sweet-time for whatever with friends and life.

last year i was living quite fast and furious, too rapid i guess....now i decided to break the pattern a little. like just simply taking time and just simply appreciating stuff as they are. so far its so simply wonderful.......

Vacation

uhrrmmmm....am so looking forward to the day after today till sunday...its hello vacation life so i will be off-in-the-buttons which include blogging and postng for awhile.........

Snap

This is the closest sketch i might have. A friend's snap of me after a tiring day out in a terrace. It was heaven to sit and lean onto something stable and hard after hours of standing and jogging.....Tired and worn out but definitely at peace!!!!!